So, it has been a really long time since I last updated my blog. Things have been pretty much the same since the last blog. I have successfully made it through my first round of chemo! I have been told by just about everyone that I talk to that even though the next round is 12 weekly infusions, it is much easier then the first round. Apparently the chemo drug I will be receiving this time is not as tough on the body and the side effects do not knock you down like the last two drugs.
I started out being able to continue with my exercise routine with slight modifications, but after eight weeks of these chemo drugs my body is just plan exhausted! I can literally fall asleep at any time as long as I am either sitting or lying down. I will be very excited to regain some energy. I met a women last week at treatment that is in her seventh week of the 12 week chemo and she said by about week five she felt like her normal self again. Her hair has also started to grow back! The whole bald head thing is really old!!!! I would love to have hair that did not require I put something over it, so I do not scare people.
Funny thing about my taste buds...they come and go. I will be a week and half out from treatment and all the sudden think, "wow I can actually taste what I am eating." It is so weird. I am very thankful for the sense of taste.
As I get further into my treatment I just want it to be over. I want to move on with my life. I want to go back to work full time and start back at school. If it were not for the chemo I would be starting back to school in a few weeks. I know that it is important for me to do this right now, but sometimes I would just like to have my "normal" life back. I will push forward and when it happens it is going to be such a sweet feeling of accomplishment!
So, I would ask that you pray what I have been this week, a resurgence of strength of body and mind. I pray for all of you that you are blessed with an abundant life filled with joy!
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
Thursday, January 27, 2011
Peace in hard times
Hello All!
I wanted to get on today and give a quick update, but my main reason is that yesterday in my daily devotional I read some amazing words of encouragement and I just wanted to share them with everyone.
I am feeling great today. I had my CBC, blood counts tested, yesterday and all my numbers looked great. I even had some numbers that were within "normal" range. So, I am very excited that my body is taking this so well and pray that it continues to rebound between each treatment. It is very important to stay on schedule with treatments to get the best results.
I noticed something interesting the other day while eating, when you can no longer taste foods you really hone in on textures. I bit into a cherry tomato and it was awesome! Now I know we all know what it feels like, smooth on the outside and when you crunch through the skin it just bursts in your mouth, but when you can not taste it the contrast is even more amazing. I have now decided to eat foods that excite my sense of touch, instead of taste. That may sound strange but I thought it was really cool.
Ok now to my devotional... Jesus Calling by Sarah Young
It is so great that I am just going to type it just as she has it in her book. I pray that this lifts your spirits in hard times the way it did for me. This book is scripture based and it is written as if Jesus is speaking to us:
Give up the illusion that you deserve a problem-free life. Part of you is still hungering for the resolution of all difficulties. This is a false hope! As I told My disciples, in the world you will have trouble. Link you hope not to problem solving in this life but to the promise of an eternity of problem-free life in heaven. Instead of seeking perfection in this fallen world, pour your energy into seeking Me: the Perfect One.
It is possible to enjoy Me and glorify Me in the midst of adverse circumstances. In fact, My Light shines most brightly through believers who trust Me in the dark. That kind of trust is supernatural: a production of My indwelling Spirit. When things seem all wrong, trust Me anyway. I am much less interested in right circumstances than in right responses to whatever comes your way.
"I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have over come the world." JOHN 16:33
Even in darkness light dawns for the upright, for the gracious and compassionate and righteous man...
He will have no fear of bad news; his heart is steadfast, trusting in the LORD. PSALM 112:4, 7
I wanted to get on today and give a quick update, but my main reason is that yesterday in my daily devotional I read some amazing words of encouragement and I just wanted to share them with everyone.
I am feeling great today. I had my CBC, blood counts tested, yesterday and all my numbers looked great. I even had some numbers that were within "normal" range. So, I am very excited that my body is taking this so well and pray that it continues to rebound between each treatment. It is very important to stay on schedule with treatments to get the best results.
I noticed something interesting the other day while eating, when you can no longer taste foods you really hone in on textures. I bit into a cherry tomato and it was awesome! Now I know we all know what it feels like, smooth on the outside and when you crunch through the skin it just bursts in your mouth, but when you can not taste it the contrast is even more amazing. I have now decided to eat foods that excite my sense of touch, instead of taste. That may sound strange but I thought it was really cool.
Ok now to my devotional... Jesus Calling by Sarah Young
It is so great that I am just going to type it just as she has it in her book. I pray that this lifts your spirits in hard times the way it did for me. This book is scripture based and it is written as if Jesus is speaking to us:
Give up the illusion that you deserve a problem-free life. Part of you is still hungering for the resolution of all difficulties. This is a false hope! As I told My disciples, in the world you will have trouble. Link you hope not to problem solving in this life but to the promise of an eternity of problem-free life in heaven. Instead of seeking perfection in this fallen world, pour your energy into seeking Me: the Perfect One.
It is possible to enjoy Me and glorify Me in the midst of adverse circumstances. In fact, My Light shines most brightly through believers who trust Me in the dark. That kind of trust is supernatural: a production of My indwelling Spirit. When things seem all wrong, trust Me anyway. I am much less interested in right circumstances than in right responses to whatever comes your way.
"I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have over come the world." JOHN 16:33
Even in darkness light dawns for the upright, for the gracious and compassionate and righteous man...
He will have no fear of bad news; his heart is steadfast, trusting in the LORD. PSALM 112:4, 7
Monday, January 24, 2011
Round Two
Ok, Ok I know I am a terrible blogger! Not sure how to change that it is just how I am.
Round two of chemo went a lot better than the first. The nurses changed the order of my meds around and started me on them earlier and even though I did still get nauseous it was no where near the first round. I was even able to walk/jog the bridge the day after chemo and it felt GREAT! I know that sounds crazy but it is so nice to get outside and exercise. It is part of my day that relaxes me and helps me feel good about my health.
So, I shaved my head last week and then on Friday the hair just kept coming out so I called my sister-in-law to come shave it closer to my scalp. It is a little uncomfortable when it is falling out. It kind of feels like someone is plucking the individual hairs out, and I have a lot of hair. It continued on Saturday to fall out even more so I used my razor that I shave my legs with and just shaved it completely, which is still not all gone. I do not understand how I still have random patches of hair. Initially I said that I felt surprisingly beautiful with a shaved head, well now that I have a partially shaved partially bald head I am not feeling so pretty, with a hat or wig off. As long as I cover up the weirdness I am wonderful.
Another interesting thing happened to me this weekend. I woke up Sunday morning got a bowl of cereal and realized I have no taste buds! Strangely enough things that you would consider comfort food, usually terrible for you, still bring comfort you are just never satisfied because you can smell the yumminess and not taste it! What a cruel cruel joke. So, I have resorted to eating mostly soup because I like the warmth. I wonder how long my taste buds will be gone for, I would like those back ASAP.
Other than hair loss and taste bud loss I am feeling great! Thank you to everyone for the continued prayers! God Bless!
Round two of chemo went a lot better than the first. The nurses changed the order of my meds around and started me on them earlier and even though I did still get nauseous it was no where near the first round. I was even able to walk/jog the bridge the day after chemo and it felt GREAT! I know that sounds crazy but it is so nice to get outside and exercise. It is part of my day that relaxes me and helps me feel good about my health.
So, I shaved my head last week and then on Friday the hair just kept coming out so I called my sister-in-law to come shave it closer to my scalp. It is a little uncomfortable when it is falling out. It kind of feels like someone is plucking the individual hairs out, and I have a lot of hair. It continued on Saturday to fall out even more so I used my razor that I shave my legs with and just shaved it completely, which is still not all gone. I do not understand how I still have random patches of hair. Initially I said that I felt surprisingly beautiful with a shaved head, well now that I have a partially shaved partially bald head I am not feeling so pretty, with a hat or wig off. As long as I cover up the weirdness I am wonderful.
Another interesting thing happened to me this weekend. I woke up Sunday morning got a bowl of cereal and realized I have no taste buds! Strangely enough things that you would consider comfort food, usually terrible for you, still bring comfort you are just never satisfied because you can smell the yumminess and not taste it! What a cruel cruel joke. So, I have resorted to eating mostly soup because I like the warmth. I wonder how long my taste buds will be gone for, I would like those back ASAP.
Other than hair loss and taste bud loss I am feeling great! Thank you to everyone for the continued prayers! God Bless!
Friday, January 14, 2011
Round One
"LLLLllllet's get ready to be nauseous!"
Ok, I am officially a blog slacker! Sorry, I intended to blog earlier about my first round of chemo. I received my first dose on January 4th, it took a little over three hours for the whole process. I think my infusion took 2 1/2 hours. The infusion was truly no big deal. They give you some anti-nausea medicine before they start the infusion along with some medicine to calm your nerves. My nerves did not really need calming but I figured they know what they are doing. I am such a light weight and never take any kind of medication so I fell asleep. Which is probably why the infusion was not a big deal to me. I was told that the anit-nausea meds they gave me should last through the day and I could start on the five different pills they gave me the next morning. Well anyone who knows me knows that I had Hyperemesis gravidarum, extreme nausea and vomiting, during my pregnancies, so needless to say I started feel sick about three hours after my infusion. All the meds I am on are great at keeping things in but not so great at making me feel better. So the nausea lasted until Saturday and I basically slept off and on between Tuesday and Saturday.
I was given a booster shot on Wednesday to help increase my WBC count and was told that this would make me feel like a horse had kicked me, mostly in the big bone areas that would produce the most WBCs. I did not experience any horse kicking but did have times of random bone pain, mostly in my low back and pelvis.
All in all the experience was not too bad, I pray that it stays like this. I realize that the further I get into this the less my body will be able to help me out.
Enough about chemo. I find it strange that people are sooo amazed at how well I am "taking" all this. Really, what benefit would I have from sitting at home on the couch crying all day. It is not that I don't think this stinks, but it is my life at this point and I try to be a joy-filled individual at all times. So to all those out there that just do not get it. It is ok, but I am just going to keep on with my positive attitude and be grateful for everyday I wake up!
Oh by the way, I still have my hair. I am at day eleven and just this morning started to see a little extra falling out in my shower. I do not have anxiety about losing my hair, but apparently I have anxiety about when I am going to lose it. I had many dreams the night before last about losing my hair in the most awkward places and at the most inopportune times. It actually is quite funny! I go today to get my synthetic wig and hope to get a real hair wig shortly.
I pray that you all have a blessed day and hope to blog more often. God Bless!
Ok, I am officially a blog slacker! Sorry, I intended to blog earlier about my first round of chemo. I received my first dose on January 4th, it took a little over three hours for the whole process. I think my infusion took 2 1/2 hours. The infusion was truly no big deal. They give you some anti-nausea medicine before they start the infusion along with some medicine to calm your nerves. My nerves did not really need calming but I figured they know what they are doing. I am such a light weight and never take any kind of medication so I fell asleep. Which is probably why the infusion was not a big deal to me. I was told that the anit-nausea meds they gave me should last through the day and I could start on the five different pills they gave me the next morning. Well anyone who knows me knows that I had Hyperemesis gravidarum, extreme nausea and vomiting, during my pregnancies, so needless to say I started feel sick about three hours after my infusion. All the meds I am on are great at keeping things in but not so great at making me feel better. So the nausea lasted until Saturday and I basically slept off and on between Tuesday and Saturday.
I was given a booster shot on Wednesday to help increase my WBC count and was told that this would make me feel like a horse had kicked me, mostly in the big bone areas that would produce the most WBCs. I did not experience any horse kicking but did have times of random bone pain, mostly in my low back and pelvis.
All in all the experience was not too bad, I pray that it stays like this. I realize that the further I get into this the less my body will be able to help me out.
Enough about chemo. I find it strange that people are sooo amazed at how well I am "taking" all this. Really, what benefit would I have from sitting at home on the couch crying all day. It is not that I don't think this stinks, but it is my life at this point and I try to be a joy-filled individual at all times. So to all those out there that just do not get it. It is ok, but I am just going to keep on with my positive attitude and be grateful for everyday I wake up!
Oh by the way, I still have my hair. I am at day eleven and just this morning started to see a little extra falling out in my shower. I do not have anxiety about losing my hair, but apparently I have anxiety about when I am going to lose it. I had many dreams the night before last about losing my hair in the most awkward places and at the most inopportune times. It actually is quite funny! I go today to get my synthetic wig and hope to get a real hair wig shortly.
I pray that you all have a blessed day and hope to blog more often. God Bless!
Friday, January 7, 2011
Happy New Year!!!
So, I am back from Colorado and had a blast with my family. We flew in on Sunday and drove into Steamboat Springs. The next morning was awesome! The weather was nice, high of 37 F, and the kids were ready to get out and play in the snow. The couple in the condo next to us lent us her plastic snow sleds and we sent the kids down the hills near our condo. They were so cute, barely able to move because we had them so completely bundled up. There was no way they were going to get cold, in fact they were hot most of the time and proceeded to eat snow constantly!
Tuesday the weather report was pretty much the same so we all decided to go skiing. Yes I am aware that I was advised, really instructed, not to go skiing, but I stayed on the green, beginner, slopes the entire day. This was almost as torturous as not skiing at all since I have been skiing since I was five and do not ever even venture towards "those green slopes." Unless to teach someone else how to ski.
Olivia went to ski school on Tuesday and Wednesday and loved it! She is a natural. She does just as her instructor tells her... point your skies down hill, go for a little while and then stop by making your skies into a slice of pizza. She shows me this over and over and every time she comes to a stop she puts on hand on her hip and turns and poses. Oh do I have my hands full! I loved it, it is so cute.
Gavin spent Tuesday skiing with my Dad. They had a great time and although I was not able to see Gavin ski my dad was able to capture an awesome picture of him skiing.
Josh and I spent Tuesday skiing together and had a great time.
The rest of the trip consisted of playing in the snow, discovering an igloo and finding some jumps to take the sleds down.
We returned to Panama City on January 2nd, I donated my hair on the 3rd and started chemo on the 4th.
My next blog will talk about the fun times of chemo.
God Bless!
Tuesday the weather report was pretty much the same so we all decided to go skiing. Yes I am aware that I was advised, really instructed, not to go skiing, but I stayed on the green, beginner, slopes the entire day. This was almost as torturous as not skiing at all since I have been skiing since I was five and do not ever even venture towards "those green slopes." Unless to teach someone else how to ski.
Olivia went to ski school on Tuesday and Wednesday and loved it! She is a natural. She does just as her instructor tells her... point your skies down hill, go for a little while and then stop by making your skies into a slice of pizza. She shows me this over and over and every time she comes to a stop she puts on hand on her hip and turns and poses. Oh do I have my hands full! I loved it, it is so cute.
Gavin spent Tuesday skiing with my Dad. They had a great time and although I was not able to see Gavin ski my dad was able to capture an awesome picture of him skiing.
Josh and I spent Tuesday skiing together and had a great time.
The rest of the trip consisted of playing in the snow, discovering an igloo and finding some jumps to take the sleds down.
We returned to Panama City on January 2nd, I donated my hair on the 3rd and started chemo on the 4th.
My next blog will talk about the fun times of chemo.
God Bless!
Friday, December 24, 2010
Merry Christmas!
Well this is unofficial good news, unofficial because my oncologist has not yet met with me about the bone scan. We had a doctor friend track done my scan while at work and my bone scan is completely normal! To those that do not know what that means... there is no sign of cancer in my bone marrow.
This is such a blessing! I did not feel like the news was going to be anything but positive, but at the same time it is nice to actually hear good news!
I start chemo on January 4th and I'm ready to get this going so I can get it over with!
I plan to donate my hair on the 3rd and get a cute pixie hair cut, that should last for one to two weeks before my hair falls out. I ordered my wig yesterday and I am excited to see how that turns out. I decided on blonde since that is my actual hair color. I also have been offered a wig from a lady that is about a year ahead of me with the same diagnosis. I do not know her and I am overwhelmed by her generosity, her wig is made of human hair and they are very expensive. She said I could style it and dye it however I want!
Sadly, a friend of mine was diagnosed with breast cancer this week, Angela. Please keep her and her family in your prayers as they start this journey. She is a wonderful women with a strong faith in God. I pray that God gives her the strength and peace that He has given me down this road.
I pray that you all have a Merry Christmas!!!!
This is such a blessing! I did not feel like the news was going to be anything but positive, but at the same time it is nice to actually hear good news!
I start chemo on January 4th and I'm ready to get this going so I can get it over with!
I plan to donate my hair on the 3rd and get a cute pixie hair cut, that should last for one to two weeks before my hair falls out. I ordered my wig yesterday and I am excited to see how that turns out. I decided on blonde since that is my actual hair color. I also have been offered a wig from a lady that is about a year ahead of me with the same diagnosis. I do not know her and I am overwhelmed by her generosity, her wig is made of human hair and they are very expensive. She said I could style it and dye it however I want!
Sadly, a friend of mine was diagnosed with breast cancer this week, Angela. Please keep her and her family in your prayers as they start this journey. She is a wonderful women with a strong faith in God. I pray that God gives her the strength and peace that He has given me down this road.
I pray that you all have a Merry Christmas!!!!
Saturday, December 18, 2010
Apparently I am having more test
Well I was wrong about not doing more test. I met with Dr. Nanfro last Thursday and he likes to do a baseline bone scan and a muga (monitor cardiac function).
I had the bone scan yesterday and must say it was a fairly uneventful experience. Having had many MRIs I was expecting the scan to be loud and uncomfortable, but I was pleasantly surprised. I was even able to watch t.v. during the scan.
I have the muga scheduled for next Tuesday. I spoke with the tech to find out what is involved. He informed me that he would draw some blood, label it, wait 20 mins, and put it back in. When it is going back in is when they monitor the cardiac function.
O.K. so this is going to be a strange correlation but you know when you buy a car you start to see it every time you drive...Well, any time I turn on the t.v. there is a story about cancer. Elizabeth Edwards losing her battle the morning of my surgery, Dr. Oz (which I do not normally watch) had a segment on things to eat and do to avoid certain cancers (missed that boat) and during my scan the channel they pick was home design and the back story for the family getting the redesign was about how their oldest daughter getting cancer. Now the whole car thing happens because you basic start looking for your new car. Are there always this many stories about cancer on t.v. and I am just now noticing it? I find this very strange. I think I will stick to my kindle for a while any avoid "Cancer t.v."
God is starting to prepare me for the next part of this journey. I have been introduced to women in my community that have gone through the same things I am about to encounter. They all have positive outlooks on the situation which is refreshing and great words of wisdom. I have also been told some tricks to avoid losing my fingernails, taking prenatal vitamins. And for those of you out their who just said, "She should check with her oncologist to see if that is ok." I already did. He said it is fine and that there are also some other things you can do to preserve your nails.
I am also meeting with the "girls" at Dr. Nanfro's office on Monday for my "chemo teaching." Apparently there is a lot to know about treatment and do's and dont's that go along with it. I already know that there are certain foods you cannot eat throughout treatment, but there also foods you should avoid right before a dose of chemo and those that you avoid a few days after treatment. Being someone who has always eaten whatever I want whenever I want without thinking or caring about it, I am going to have to adjust a lot. I am really going to miss my sushi!
I pray that as we approach Christmas day that you are all blessed with the presence of God in your life and the joy and peace that goes along with his presence.
I had the bone scan yesterday and must say it was a fairly uneventful experience. Having had many MRIs I was expecting the scan to be loud and uncomfortable, but I was pleasantly surprised. I was even able to watch t.v. during the scan.
I have the muga scheduled for next Tuesday. I spoke with the tech to find out what is involved. He informed me that he would draw some blood, label it, wait 20 mins, and put it back in. When it is going back in is when they monitor the cardiac function.
O.K. so this is going to be a strange correlation but you know when you buy a car you start to see it every time you drive...Well, any time I turn on the t.v. there is a story about cancer. Elizabeth Edwards losing her battle the morning of my surgery, Dr. Oz (which I do not normally watch) had a segment on things to eat and do to avoid certain cancers (missed that boat) and during my scan the channel they pick was home design and the back story for the family getting the redesign was about how their oldest daughter getting cancer. Now the whole car thing happens because you basic start looking for your new car. Are there always this many stories about cancer on t.v. and I am just now noticing it? I find this very strange. I think I will stick to my kindle for a while any avoid "Cancer t.v."
God is starting to prepare me for the next part of this journey. I have been introduced to women in my community that have gone through the same things I am about to encounter. They all have positive outlooks on the situation which is refreshing and great words of wisdom. I have also been told some tricks to avoid losing my fingernails, taking prenatal vitamins. And for those of you out their who just said, "She should check with her oncologist to see if that is ok." I already did. He said it is fine and that there are also some other things you can do to preserve your nails.
I am also meeting with the "girls" at Dr. Nanfro's office on Monday for my "chemo teaching." Apparently there is a lot to know about treatment and do's and dont's that go along with it. I already know that there are certain foods you cannot eat throughout treatment, but there also foods you should avoid right before a dose of chemo and those that you avoid a few days after treatment. Being someone who has always eaten whatever I want whenever I want without thinking or caring about it, I am going to have to adjust a lot. I am really going to miss my sushi!
I pray that as we approach Christmas day that you are all blessed with the presence of God in your life and the joy and peace that goes along with his presence.
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